A fallen angel, learning to fly again....

This is the first free time I have had in.... I can't remember. Its Saturday afternoon, I have finished work, voted, and now have nothing to do. Most people are at work, have a family lunch, or are at a comp, so I'm making the most of my alone time to blog. As most of you are aware, it's been a trying couple of months for me, but I think I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. As I mentioned before, My beautiful Niece, Chelsea was born recently, and I have received a new car to replace my old one. Work still sucks, but that's never going to change, and as for my personal life, well that's still difficult at times, but it's getting easier, slowly. It's during these hard times that you learn to appreciate true friends, Erin and Jodie have been my angels and I want to thank them both heaps.

It's strange how relationships (of any kind) can alter so quickly. A year ago, I didn't even know Ez, and now she's one of my best friends. I think I talk to her, and spend more time with her than any other person. She's fantastic at making me laugh, and is always available for a chat when I need it. And even though Ben and I have broken up, and our relationship has changed, we still remain close, and I regard him as a best friend also. After all, he knows more about me and my life than any other person in this world, and I still completely trust him with that information. I am going to miss him so much when he leaves, but I know he's going to have a great time. I truly am lucky to have such a great group of friends. When life is hard and you feel like you are falling, it's these people whom help you fly. I love you all more than I can say.

During the "emo weeks" I even considered giving up dancing, which is something that I have always enjoyed. I am so relieved that I didn't. I'm really starting to love it again. I am currently doing my Gold Cha Cha and Gold Carousel exam, which I will be performing in costume on Sunday 16Th December for anyone who is able to come and watch. My exams will probably be around 4ish (to be confirmed) so I thought we could all go out for dinner afterwards. Your support would be appreciated as I still get extremely nervous dancing my exams! I think having monday nights off from dancing (even though I still do reception at the studio) is helping too. Previously, I was dancing 5 nights a week and working full time, and it was exhausting! Now I do reception Mondays and Saturdays, tuesdays and thursdays I teach, and wednesdays and fridays are my nights off. It makes a huge difference, and allows some needed relaxation time.


So yeah, life is getting better slowly, or at least I have stopped allowing things to get me down as much as possible. I have realized that we don't always get what we want, nor are we always dealt a fair hand, but the test is how we handle each situation, and to make the most out of life.

"Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but sometimes, playing a poor hand well".

Beep Beep....Barina

Finally it's here. This is my new car :P

Give me something to sing about....

Well finally I have a reason to smile. I became an Auntie for the second time today. CHELSEA JANE ORROCK was born this afternoon and she is beautiful (photos to follow). Also I should be getting my new car at the end of the week (hopefully) although I have to return my hire car tomorrow which is already causing problems..... it might be time to call in on some of those promised lifts peoples ;)
Anyway it's late and I'm at Mum's house still, and I hear my bed calling, so goodnight.

I said ENOUGH!!!!!!!!

Seriously, God, or Karma, or whomever is controlling my life, enough is enough. I have had it! I can't cope with anymore. Life is suppose to be easier than this. I can't handle what's going on at the moment, and I feel as though the universe it laughing at me. I don't deserve this, nor do I want this shit to continue. This is all getting too hard, and even those people whom I thought would be there to support me through anything are slipping away. It's time to give up, in fact, I believe I already have....

Enough is enough!

Let me lists the reasons why my life completely sucks at the moment....

In the last two weeks I have experienced:

Money problems
Heartbreak
Stress
A car accident in which I totalled my car
Injuries (yes I'm still in pain)
and now I have to find a new home....

One more hassle or crisis, and I'm giving up on life!